


Sherlock and the Sandwich

by Explizit_Lizards



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Completed, Dick Jokes, Jawn, M/M, One Shot, Sandwich, Sherlock Holmes - Freeform, johnlokc, joke, sherlock/ john watson, sherlock/ sandwich, this fic is really awful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2020-03-20 12:35:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18992773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Explizit_Lizards/pseuds/Explizit_Lizards
Summary: John and Sherlock go to a diner to get some lunch and things get interesting.





	Sherlock and the Sandwich

Sherlock sat on the red leather cushion of the diner booth across from JAWN; a man Sherlock had loved and admired for years. The diner was small and filled with many people milling about; no one noticed the 2 men hunkered down in the corner. Sherlock slouched down in his seat, waiting impatiently for food that would hopefully stop the constant sound of his stomach growling. It had been days since he'd eaten, and the affects were weighing him down. He needed to fuel up before his next case. JAWN and Sherlock had already ordered and the long wait was making Sherlock antsy. So he did what he always did when he was bored: he began deducing the people around him.

"See that woman over there?" he asked, pointing to a tall woman sitting near the back of the diner. John nodded in assent. "Well, she's a drug dealer. In fact, she's a drug lord! She runs two of the world's biggest underground drug webs." JAWN grunted, obviously not in the mood for Sherlock's famous deductions. 

After deducing a few more people, the detective began to notice JAWN'S disinterest and got annoyed. Maybe he would deduce JAWN-- that would bring the man's attention back to him.

"JAWN, I deduce from the obvious bags under your eyes and wrinkles in your shirt you only got 3 hours of sleep last night, and based on your outfit you spilled two lumps of sugar into your tea and you forgot to brush your teeth this morning. You had plans to go visit Mrs. Hudson but you weren't feeling well so you decided to cancel." JAWN just rolled his eyes, obviously not amused. Sherlock humphed at JAWN's indifferent composure and slumped back against the seat. 

Finally after 30 minutes a waiter came with their food. The waiter was a thin, snively man, and held one single plate above his head, which he sat in front of JAWN. Sherlock stared at JAWN's steaming dish and looked up at the waiter his eye round and confused. The waiter looked down his hooked nose at Sherlock and sneered, 

"We had a mix up with your food. It'll be out in about 30 minutes." Sherlock gaped in betrayal, his stomach growling; caving in on itself from its lack of food. Sherlock could practically feel his stomach shrinking. He sat up straighter and glared daggers at the waiter. 

"Well your mother has been cheating on your father for 15 years now and she never loved you, so there!" Sherlock spat in rage.

"Well I never!" The waiter stalked off, extremely upset with Sherlock's words. Sherlock was not amused by this little mix up. He was so hungry he feared he would have to resort to cannibalism. Sherlock stared longingly at JAWNS long, juicy......

SANDWICH.

His mouth drooled at the thought of having its soft warm bread in his mouth. He just wanted a taste; just one little suckle. The aroma of the pungent salami and the sweet, gooey mustard made Sherlock groan aloud. JAWN didn't seem to notice Sherlock's discomfort and dug right in, shoving the sandwich into his open maw. Watching JAWN eat the delectable sandwich was agony. Sweat began to run down Sherlock's forehead he couldn't take the sound of JAWN'S strong, beautiful jaws taking bite after bite from that delicious sandwich. Finally Sherlock couldn't take it anymore-- without waiting for JAWN'S consent, Sherlock wrapped his bird-like hands around JAWN'S beautiful, mouthwatering...

SANDWICH

and forcefully shoved it into his mouth. Hungrily, he took a giant bite out of it, absorbing all the flavors. JAWN was very surprised when Sherlock had taken his scrumptious sandwich away from him, and his surprise soon turned to anger.

"Hey!" He yelled, "that's my sandwich!" He was standing now, looming over Sherlock. Sherlock shrank back and tried to hide the sandwich away from JAWN. JAWN snatched for the sandwich but Sherlock was too quick. 

"But JAWN, I'm sooo hungry! You don't want me to starve, do you?" JAWN ignored Sherlock's whines and grabbed for the sandwich again. His movement caused him to loose his balance and sent him tottering forward. He fell over the table and straight onto Sherlock, their lips colliding rather violently. At first they didn't move; they were both paralyzed from the shock of what just happened. They sat there open mouths pressed together mixed with bits of sandwich still in Sherlock's mouth. 

Embarrassed, JAWN pulled away. 

"Sorry," he muttered pushing himself off of Sherlock. Sherlock looked at JAWN, disappointed at the sudden end to the kiss. He had never been so close to JAWN, and the close contact made him feel something he had never felt before. With his cheeks flushed, he handed JAWN back the sandwich. JAWN timidly took it back grunting, a thank you to Sherlock. He was halfway to bringing the sandwich to his mouth when he saw the crestfallen expression on the other man's face. He mentally argued with himself about weather to give Sherlock the sandwich-- 'but it's my sandwich! ' part of him argued, but the other part of him was too weak and too bent to Sherlock's cute little pout. Begrudgingly, he handed Sherlock back the sandwich. Sherlock perked up, surprised by JAWN's offer. He hesitantly reached for the sandwich making sure that this was what JAWN truly wanted. JAWN nodded to Sherlock's raised eyebrow reassuring him that it was ok for him to take his painfully thick, oozing....

SANDWICH

into his hands. With tender, trembling fingers, Sherlock wrapped his hands around the long, ridiculously big...

SANDWICH.

His fingers brushed JAWN's as he did so. He thought back to their accidental kiss and then back to the sandwich and seemed to mentally decide something. He threw the sandwich over his shoulder and grabbed JAWN, pulling him down into a long, passionate kiss. 

A loud gruff voice startled them apart moments later, and they looked up to see the waiter holding a fresh, steaming plate above his head. 

"Anyone order a sandwich?"

**Author's Note:**

> I would like to thank all of you for reading this atrocious fic


End file.
